We leave for chicago two weeks from tomorrow and will be there for 2 weeks, back to texas, then on to D.C. for 6 weeks or so, Lord willing.
Still seems God is hitting home deeper deeper deeper what it means to truly stop. to cease my ideas and plans and scheming in my head and just stop. To stoop down in the dirt on my knees, and empty my hands- lay it all down and then pick up 1 thing and 1 thing alone: Him. and this is teaching me that it's very typical of this above and beyond God of mine to then insist that I muster up the faith/trust to ask Him for the very good and perfect things He desires for me to ask Daddy for. Because what are heart's desires but very good blessings God gets a kick out out of giving those kids He knows are centered and consumed with Him. He is not threatened by abundance and superfluous, nor should I be.
And for His sake, I am refusing fear and the assumption of the worst in an attempt to take care of my own heart and am declaring from this day onward that He is my hope and safe place, my Home to rest and be myself and laugh and be taken care of and loved. I'm tired of hurting His heart by putting up walls and living thngs out halfway. Fear of anything but Him is pure stupidity and straight up sin and must be fought with the fierceness and passion that God requires of those who love Him.
He has never hurt me and that's all I need to rest my hat on. All. You can throw your whole entire self into the God-basket and then let yourself rest, knowing you'll never get betrayed, wounded, or walked out on.
This is the day, this is the one He made for us. Tomorrow doesn't own you, nor does the past. God alone rightfully, legally owns you. And in this our hearts find peace.