so THIS is prayer...

i'm writing this from the ihop coffee shop in kansas city, mo USA.
and, at moments, i'm wondering how exactly i find myself back in kc yet again...
:)
a couple weekends ago, i found myself at the annual YWAM staff conference we have in dallas, tx.
i carpooled down there with 3 dear ywam buddies.
we arrived @ the conference 7 minutes before it began.
niiiice.

it was such a super weekend.
oh man, just SO much face-to-face friend time. much needed, much goodness of the Lord displayed in the faces of some quality humans- all brothers & sisters i am privileged to call friends.
thank You Lord. truly.

can i TESTIFY for a minute to you about how NUTSO GOOD our God is?
i have officially fallen in love with my God to a whole new extent.


while i was in dallas, i got a phone call sunday night from my ma.
she wanted to let me know that my gramps was in the hospital and not doing so hot. and that he had found peace with the Lord and was ready to head Home after 84 years of life.

a couple years ago, my gramps accepted Christ.
there were some outward, obvious changes but nothing extremely different.
however, on saturday my gramps was talking with an old friend of his and told him how he "felt like he betrayed the Lord" with his lack of fervor in seeking Him the past couple years.
he got right with God that night & asked to be baptized right there in his hospital bed.
if you'd known my gramps- you'd right about now be attempting to backflip and cartwheel and slobber on yourself for surprise and ecstatic happiness' sake. :)


here's a tiny glimpse into my gramps' life.
it's a wild, raging success story in the eyes of our God.
but it was no cake walk...my gramps' life puts the Restoration of God on display for all to see.

in the 1920's, gramps' father walked out on him and his 7 siblings while they were young.
this obviously affects a kid. and affects a kid as he turns into an adult. and for most his life, gramps struggled with showing affections/emotions, and it was difficult at times for his own children, my mom and her 5 siblings, to bond easily with him during their upbringing...

about 30 years ago my gramps went to church one day and saw 2 men laughing at the apparel of a homeless man who happened to attend church that day.
their hypocrisy upset him so much that he wanted little to do with the "Church"...
gramps never went back to church from that day forward.

and from about that point forward, my grams spilled her guts into praying for him for almost 30 years.
30 YEARS.
30.
this amount of time won't even sink into my noggin. it's a wildly long time. almost double the amount of time i have walked this earth. it boggles my mind. and especially my heart.

you see, grams continued to remain faithful to God 1st and gramps 2nd, never relenting in her fire and pursuit of God despite his rampant apathy and indifference day after day; week after week; year after long year...

when she talked about gramps it was rarely with her own eyes- she'd always talk to you about gramps as if she knew his "rough" parts, but she'd always focus on his good parts. always.
as she prayed for my gramps all those years, she allowed the Lord to give her HIS perspective and heart on him. she leaned on His infinite grace, patience, hope, perspective and love i will never look at abiding the same.
and i will never look at prayer and real love the same.

my dear friend/mentor sharon asked to come to my hotel room that sunday night after i had received the phone call about my gramps getting ready to die. she asked to just be with me and pray with me for my family.
we felt impressed by God to pray that my gramps would get supernatural empowerment and courage to begin reconciling with individuals in his life that he needed to make mends with...

i got a phone call from my bro a couple hours later.
turns out, that just as God was praying those prayers through us- my gramps called all my family into his hospital room there in saint joseph, mo and asked them to shut the door.
he then proceeded to call up individuals one by one and apologize/speak his heart/share any life wisdom he felt specific individuals needed to hear.


one of the last things he told my brother was "loving people and staying close to the Lord are the two most important things you must do with your life...i am ready to go Home. because your grandma stayed close to the Lord and didnt give up on me i get to go to Heaven and will meet you all there...i'm ready"
he then stopped all medicines and treatments.
he finally had broke free of all fear of hell.

i was able to catch a last minute plane back to kc on monday.
i got to say hello to gramps and see him one last time.
he spoke his last understandable words to me.
and 24 hours later a bunch of my family, all huddled together around his hospital bed, watched him take his last breath and cross over from here to There & go Home-- only 48 hours after he had reconciled and tied up all his loose, earthly ends.


it's certainly a wild success story friends!

my cousin's husband jon was there to view that night of reconciliation in gramps' hospital room.
the Lord gave him this song about it:


"going there before you"

i sat next to grandpa the other day
he was weak but had some things to say
and so i listened to him talk about his life
kids, grandkids, and wife
and would they be ok?

and he said
the days are getting short it won't be long
'til Jesus comes to take me Home
and i'll see you in...
Heaven is the place i long to be
no more pain; i'll be set free
i'm just going there before you

i watched him say goodbye to his sons
'forgive me for any wrong i've done'
i have always loved you
his daughters attend to every need
they clean him up and help the old man eat
he knows he is a blessed man

then he turned and right there by his side
holding hands, it was his lovely bride
thanks for being faithful
to the Lord and to my family
and thanks for never giving up on me
because of you, i can see our Father smiling
Betty, you should see Him smiling
He's smiling for you

from your prayers, i asked Him in my heart
and for eternity we will not part
i'm just going there before you
'tell everyone...' he said, as i drew near
'who has eyes to see and ears to hear that they can have this, too'
'let go, let God into your life,
He'll take away your struggle and your strife
i'm blessed i finally learned that'

grandpa passed away the other day
he had said all he had to say
now it's up to you to listen...



i am humbled and oh so blessed to call someone like betty kingsley my grams.
i never quite got it;
never understood how someone could do it. day after day pray for a human with virtually no change or hope of change according to what her eyes were seeing.
but now, maybe, just maybe, i'm learning...
maybe she never bothered trying to get hope or patience, faith or love by looking with her physical eyes- but with her spiritual eyes.

oh Lord, may we never attempt to pray for someone from our own perspective again.
may we lean into You God and Your infinite, limitless grace, longsuffering, hope, patience and love for someone.

may we daily, moment by moment truly live in reality.
the REAL reality of the unseen and eternal.
like gramps said as he slipped from here to There,
"it's all a mirage. all this world, all you can see with your eyes, is a mirage..."